My husband and I were rolling in laughter as we watched these tiny persons whiz down from the top of our highest hill, then continue to slide across the driveway and go airborne over the second hill, landing in the middle of the pasture and stopping only feet away from our creek (whew!). My husband noted that one of the joys of parenting—more exciting than experiencing the fun yourself—is seeing your children enjoy what you found exciting as a child.
I always enjoy my husband's tidbits of wisdom, especially after he grinds his dark roast coffee beans and waits the four minutes for them to brew in his press. He leans against the stove, with a sparkle in his eyes, excited to analyze the moments of the day with me. I am very drawn to words of wisdom—a rich quote, a deep book, the Scripture verses on my windowsill—and, as a parent, I often feel desperate for wisdom!
So, today, I am putting this verse on my windowsill:
"If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God,
that giveth to all liberally, and upbraideth not;
and it shall be given him."
--James 1:5
The journal continues…
In thinking back to Paul's allegory in chapter 4, Ishmael (a symbol of legalism) could not coexist with Isaac (a symbol of grace). You cannot mix law and grace, flesh and Spirit, faith and works, God's gift of righteousness and man's attempts to earn righteousness. God commanded Abraham to send away his son Ishmael. Abraham's broken heart meant Israel's liberty; likewise, God's giving of His Son means our liberty in Christ.
A few days ago I learned the purpose of the law, but I must be careful to not let it sneak its lustful way into my parenting. Legalism is not the setting of standards—it is worshipping these standards and thinking that we are spiritual because we obey them. It is judging other believers on the basis of these standards.
The goal of parenting is not 'good' children.
That will only lead us to the dreaded, 'I don't understand what happened…he/she was such a good kid before.' No, the goal of all true believers is to raise children who know their God and all the riches of His grace, as hopefully seen shining through the life of their parents through the power of the Holy Spirit—the secret to living by grace, through faith.
My Dare:
To check my motives in discipline—if I am anxious, a ball of stress, impatient, complaining, fussing, arguing, justifying, embarrassed, overreacting—perhaps I am more concerned as to how my children offended me, rather than our holy God.
Was I more bothered because it was my Christmas decoration box that was messed with, possibly causing special decorations to be broken or because they need to learn a respect for the things of others, thus showing a Christ-like concern on the behalf of others? Would I have been upset if it had been a different box with items I did not care about? And, in all my rantings, I missed how nicely everything was put back and the kid's beautifully decorated rooms that matched the glow of excitement on their faces.
Was this a time for discipline or careful training? The latter! My unrealistic standards sucked all the joy out of the beautiful morning God gave us. This is not how I teach grace to my children. The Spirit would have me learn patience, the biting of my tongue, a slowness to wrath, and true wisdom that would have seen exactly what was taking place.
As we live by the Spirit, we gain all the wisdom we need as parents!
Amid the dry, barrenness of winter, there is always one luscious bowl of color on my counter. Citrus. Oranges and Grapefruit to slice up throughout the day. Lemons for our salads and limes for our Pellegrinos. My daughter excitedly said to me one morning at breakfast, as she handed me a mound of orange peels for the compost, that she wishes she could live in a valley of citrus trees with only a soft little leaf as her bed. Needless to say, we are the peculiar family that drives past Disney World on our Florida vacation to enjoy a whole day of citrus picking and slurping down fresh squeezed orange juice slushies.
But, better than the juiciness of a fresh picked orange, is the fruit that frees me from myself and fills the souls of children with endless delight. Join me tomorrow as we come to the end of chapter 5 of Galatians, to the awaited passage bearing the fruit of the Spirit.
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